Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
This is an experiment to see how honest people can be if they don't have to identify themselves. Some silly, some deep, but all require honesty.
Read this first.
Have a burning question?
Most of these questions are now submitted. Please feel free to submit your question and see how others feel. Email me here with a subject line of "Anonymous Truth"
Most spirited questions
counter
Blog Archive
-
▼
2009
(261)
-
▼
July
(23)
- Reader Rally
- What is your monthly grocery budget? Does it incl...
- What mistake do you make over and over?
- What two words describe your lifestyle?
- When was your most gratifying moment?
- Reader Rally
- When is the angriest you have been?
- What would you like to know more about?
- What would you title your autobiography?
- How many sexual partners have you had? How old wer...
- Reader Rally
- How close are you to weighing what your driver's l...
- What word do you think is.... 1. the grossest 2. ...
- Confession is good for the soul, so...
- If you could open any business you wanted, what wo...
- Reader Rally
- Was Michael Jackson's life worth all the hype of h...
- What are your thoughts on the following video? TJ...
- What are your thoughts on Sarah Palin's resignation?
- If you were not married to your spouse, what do yo...
- Reader Rally
- When is it appropriate to tell someone they are dr...
- What television show are you embarrassingly addict...
-
▼
July
(23)
40 comments:
Yes, Although I know it would be really uncomfortable, but there are a lot of teenage girls dressed imodestly, even at church. Should you randomly yell out to someone you don't know "hey, you look like a whore, go change" no. But if you have some sort of relationship, any relationship with a girl and you see her at church with a skirt barely covering her bottom, you should pull her quietly aside and lovingly tell her she probably isn't dressed approriately and she needs to be mindful of what she is wearing in the future because obviously her parents aren't telling her what is approriate and what isn't.
I think you should do it very privately, where no one is around.
I also don't think you should talk about them behind their backs. For example, don't go talking about their dress and then "ask other people for advice on how to tell them it's innappropriate" that's just wrong.
Due to some past job experience, I learned alot about the minds of pedophiles.................. It makes me sick when I see little girls dressed like... um,... you know what I mean b/c I don't doubt for a sec that they are providing visual pleasure to a sex offender.
I think you should do it only to your own children. I don't really think it is your place, otherwise.
there is a pregnant 20 something at church that dresses like a whore as well. She sits near the front and people can just about see her butt when she stands or is about to sit down. Also people have seen her getting out of her truck at church and gives crotch shots. Apparently people have told her and she doesn't care. She likes the attention.
This girl is beautiful and doesn't need to do this. I have no clue why she does it.
You don't know why she does it, but you gossip about it. "Apparently people have told her..."
Specks and planks, people.
And let me add that Jesus would have sat right next to her.
I agree with 6:28.
I will admit that it would be very unusual for me to confront, even lovingly, an adult about how they dress.
If a teen is wearing something too low, AND I KNOW HER PERSONALLY, I may catch her eye and pantomime pulling up the top of her shirt and mouthing the word "cover" to her.
"And let me add that Jesus would have sat right next to her.. . ." and in a kind and gentle way tried to convince her of the need to adjust her behavior both for herself and for those around her
9:53, I totally agree with you.
I think you have to be careful here. Some people (as I have found from personal experience) have very extreme definitions of modesty. You can really hurt a girl by inflicting your own rules on them. And trust me, I'm pretty modest in my own attire and very cautious about the image I'm portraying of myself...but I have even I have been pulled aside by women who were more conservative than I was and "politely reprimanded" for my attire. I also work with teenage girls fairly regularly and I have watched sweet, well intentioned, tastefully dressed girls be cut to the quick because someone felt that sleeveless dresses were immodest, that the girl forgot to put a slip on was immodest, or their skirt was an inch shorter than THEY thought was appropriate. I'm not saying that you should NEVER say anything...but be sure your opinion is shared and that you're not inflicting your own strict values.
I think it would be okay to pull them aside and talk to them privately. Maybe she doesn't have a good female role model to share with her what is appropriate, or have never heard what a pedophile is thinking.
It is appropriate if:
they are related to you or
they already have a realtionship with you
you are in a position of authority over you
the way they are dressing is causing problems
you are speaking to them privately
you can talk to them about it without running to your 17 best friends, no matter what the person's reaction to you was
I am constandly surprised by the clothes that girls are allowed to leave the house in. I think: Don't they have mamas who can clue them in to standards of modesty? I have encountered mothers (NEVER fathers, for some strange reason) whose standards of modesty are A LOT looser than I would consider appropriate. For example: "Look at her! Why shouldn't she show it off?"
Moms, protect your daughters. Set the good examples yourselves, by not dressing "like a whore." Otherwise, fathers, load your shotguns.
7:59, what if you 12 year old daughter brought a friend over to your house and she was wearing a pair of pants that said "Juicy Flirt" or "Spank me" right across her bottom? Your telling me you wouldn't say anything about that? I am not saying yell at her or anything, just maybe offer to let her go get a pair of your daughter's pants to change into and if that continues then metion something to her.
I think you have to be a lot more overt than just setting a good example and not dressing "like a whore," because there are plenty of other examples being set for girls.
Moms and dads, too, should be involved about talking about these issues casually. If you never mention these things, then it could sound like a lecture when you finally bring it up.
When did "whore" become an acceptable word?
When did whore become a bad word?
I am 8:27 and did not know I would be attacked. I am not gossiping about her. I didn't mention her name. I don't know her personally so that is why I have never said anything.
I was with a group of other women who were talking about her and how inappropriate it was. I went to a friend of mine who is friends with her and I said "several people at church are talking about how so and so dresses and maybe you should mention it to her." She said to me "we have told her, but that is how she always dresses and she does it purposely for the attention."
So I really wasn't gossiping - I was just answering the question and saying that sometimes even if you tell someone it may not really matter.
That was gossip. Your own defense of yourself proves that.
It doesn't make her behavior right. But yours isn't right either. If you have a problem with somebody, either go to them, or let it go. What does Jesus call us to on this?
You even say she dresses like a whore, which is obviously offensive to some of the people here. Do you see that you are attacking this person's character by saying that this pregnant lady dresses like somebody who tries to get people to pay them for sex? And have you actually seen prostitutes? Because I am guessing she just really dresses in a revealing way, but not really like a whore.
This is no attack on you. I don't know you personally. I am not mentioning your name. I am just talking to you directly about your own behavior.
I hate the pants with sayings on the kids' rear end. I know there are parents on this board that think that is perfectly fine, really?? Why do you want some pervert drawn to looking at your 8 year old's rear?? Even it is just says "cheer" or whatever, my daughers will not be allowed to wear those.
Who are you to tell me what I can wear? Butt out and mind your own business.
I truly hope you're not the one speaking to my daughter about what she's wearing, because she's wearing it with my permission. Again, I'm her parent, not you. Butt out. Stop your judging. Just because I don't share your standards doesn't mean I'm less, or a "whore" as you so nicely put it. Be more careful with your words, and realize that you can't control everything.
Who are YOU to try to make MY husband lust after you????
Why else would you dress that way?
I really don't think people who dress that way (which hasn't been defined) are setting out to make my husband or yours lust after them.
yes they do, woman and myself included do dress in a way to not only attract our husbands attention, but also the attention of other men,
When did "inappropriately dressed" and "whore" become synonymous?
there is a difference, when you show a little too much cleavage, then that is inappropriate, when you almost pop out of your top, or your butt cheeks show when you sit down, then that is being a whore
My whole life I've thought that the term "whore" meant someone with a ton of sexual partners. Come to find out you're a whore if you show too much skin.
Wish I'd know that before. I guess there's been a time or two in my life where I was whore and didn't even know it.
Well, I continue to be embarrassed about having invited my friends to check things out here.
I hope that they understand that YOUR judgmental comments have nothing to do with MY attitudes.
When I first heard about this blog, I thought it sounded fun and interesting. So I told friends about it. I do hope they are not offended.
If you are admitting that you dress to attract the attention of men other than your husband, I appreciate your honesty, but you make me really angry.
Cover your boobs. Your desire should be for your husband, and not for the attention of mine.
Do those of you who think that it is okay to show some cleavage, buttocks, etc, do you think it would be okay for a man to show a little bit of his penis? Not the whole thing, just a little bit, like with cleavage.
How would you feel if a man showed a little bit of his penis, buttocks, and chest and the walked around your teenage girls and flaunted himself.
I would think it's gross. Have you seen a penis? Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Or, better yet, a speedo swimsut. Yeah, what if a guy whering nothing but a speedo swimsuit came and sat next to you. How would you feel?
7:12, HA HA HA... that is so gross to even think about.
That gave me a good laugh.
Like he needed to put more clothes on. But not like I wanted to have sex with him.
Women aren't wired the same way.
8:27, I know who you are referring to. I have had the same thoughts every time I see her. I have never discussed these thoughts with anyone other than my husband. She is beautiful, but dresses TOTALLY inappropriately for church. I always feel bad for her husband, wondering if he realizes how bad it looks. I don't think she's a whore, but she definitely is causing people to stumble, who struggle with lust. I'm honestly surprised that none of the elders wives have talked to them. I certainly don't know them well enough to say anything.
if she dresses that way for worship service I can't imagine how slutty she dresses when she is out and about.
Whoa, 3:58, have you read what you said?
Maybe that is how she dresses all the time. Maybe who she is does not change when she walks into a building. Should we give God our best? Yes. Should we consider our appearance? Oh yes.
And if you have a problem with it and are not willing to go to her, whether you know her or not, you need to grow a pair. Pray for the boldness to do what perhaps your conscience is telling you to do.
You should lovingly talk to this sister. But you need to pray before you do that you will come off lovingly. Explain that it distracts people, even though it shouldn't. Bathe your comments in love.
Your willingness to be judgmental and not go to her, and gossip about her here, as more than one of you have now done, is WRONG.
Please, please, please correct this. It is definitely missing the mark of who Jesus calls you to be.
Yes, if you can't go talk to her, you should consider going forward to ask for prayers for yourself.
Alright, just to follow up, did anybody talk to the lady whose clothing choice was the subject of much controversy?
You probably had the opportunity. Did the Holy Spirit nudge you to go to her??
I am CURIOUS. Wondering if actual good comes from these discussions.
I haven't seen her in months, so I don't have a clue.
Post a Comment